WEBVTT

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 Oh, lovely.

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 So are we live?

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 Welcome, welcome, welcome to Dharma class on a Tuesday, where apparently the little gremlins

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 and mischief makers of the mind are manifesting themselves in real time.

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 You may be hearing a small noise regularly in the background, and you may be thinking what

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 the heck is wrong with Neil that he can't handle his tech better.

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 Well, for once it's not Neil's fault.

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 We're here in the beautiful rotary hall, which is a tiny bit chilly tonight because

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 the power's out.

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 And we did not know that until we got here.

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 The Intrepid Chelly and Neil have set up the room, which is empty.

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 I think all of a sudden a normal people are home with the power out, assuming there's no

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 class.

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 So it is Neil.

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 It is Shelley.

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 It is Richard.

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 And here comes Kim Farley.

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 So we're just streaming live, and I was just saying how it's Shelley and Neil and Richard.

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 And now it's Kim Farley.

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 You can leave your shoes on because it's cool.

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 The floor is cool.

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 The power is out, honey.

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 So welcome to Dharma class.

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 And thankfully we have we, I'm going to use the Royal Week, have managed to stream

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 the class on some cell bars.

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 And so here comes Carolyn, they're trickling in.

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 And in a moment, we'll start the class.

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 But so we're working with change.

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 We're working with the unexpected.

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 We're working with things that a mind could choose to find annoying.

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 Like maybe a persistent alarm that is ringing over and over.

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 over, which my handyman has been tried to fix,

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 and unless he wants to commit a felony

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 and break into the lock box,

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 we're gonna meditate with a beat.

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 We're going to have a Dharma class with a beat,

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 and we're bringing you life, 'cause the power's out.

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 Thanks to the Wonders of Technology,

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 we're patching this in through Shelley's iPhone.

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 So, that is our talk tonight,

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 and we get to work with the phenomenon of beeps,

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 arising, and passing away.

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 The stories the mind may make,

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 arising, and passing away.

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 So, oh, I will unpack my doll,

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 and then we will begin.

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 Hello, anybody online?

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 Do we have folks online?

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 Because a lot of them may be out of power as well.

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 I didn't know there was a windstorm.

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 It wasn't windy at my home.

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 We must have a little buffer today.

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 So, do we have to never ride on it's jeans,

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 have their dog, and their leash, keep the same jacket?

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 Nice. Welcome, everybody. Welcome.

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 I'm glad your power's on,

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 so you're able to join us virtually.

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 All right.

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 So, we will begin, although there's no real beginnings,

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 and no real endings.

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 There's just a continuing, of a rising through birth,

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 and releasing through death.

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 But, for now, we are here.

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 (bell dings)

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 Setting an aspiration for the sake of all beings

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 may we cultivate a mind that is flexible,

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 where we can spot the story and allow it to dissolve,

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 where we can work,

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 with what is, whether it's pleasant, unpleasant, or neutral.

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 So it's a pleasure to be here with my small intimate group

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 of friends, and I think the baseball game outside.

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 And I'm going to pivot a little bit my plan for this evening.

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 I'm going to offer a talk.

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 And then I may give you homework.

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 I may suggest that you do your own meditation

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 for 30 minutes after the talk.

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 And that my dear friends and here in person,

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 perhaps do a 30 minute meditation when they get home.

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 Although I am very tempted to meditate

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 on allowing the beep to a rise and pass away, we'll see.

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 But I'll watch into a talk first.

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 There is no hope that the beep will stop by the way unless

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 maybe the power comes back on, and I'm not sure what automatically

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 reset them.

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 So it's kind of beautiful that my intention tonight

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 was to speak about the stories the mind makes up,

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 and to speak about the reactivity of the mind

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 when things happen that we don't want.

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 And so really, I know we're awfully close to April 1st,

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 but this wasn't all a setup, wasn't it?

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 Let's play an April pools joke called the teacher.

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 So let me begin this way.

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 And some of you will have heard.

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 Some of these phrases I choose to share before.

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 And you will have heard some of these topics before.

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 But it really rose strongly for me today

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 to speak about emotions and to speak about training

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 the mind, and to speak about how do we work

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 with the mind's reactivity?

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 So those are some of the themes I'll be touching on tonight.

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 And then I can--

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 can certainly expand upon in our talks.

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 Now Kim, that disruptive rock and rollers.

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 She's playing music now.

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 I think the wind--

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 I used to have horses.

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 And when it was windy, horses really get their wind up.

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 And they get really kind of spazzy and excited.

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 And they gelled around, not necessarily

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 out of fear.

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 It's like-- it just calls to their spirits.

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 I think all the Dartmouth students

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 are a little horse windy at the moment.

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 Is it in Europe, the horse?

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 Chinese?

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 Oh, I thought it stopped.

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 Yes, fire horse?

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 There you go.

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 All right.

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 I'll start with this.

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 Here's a way I like to teach.

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 And answer to the following question, what is an emotion?

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 What is an emotion?

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 And I'd like everybody to generate for yourself right now

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 a list of negative emotions, unpleasant emotions,

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 unwanted emotions, rigid namely, sadness and fear

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 over a cheaper name too, Neil, annoyance,

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 annoyance, totally random choice, Carolyn, anxiety, Kim,

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 disappointment, Shelley, anger.

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 Yes, there's a small sampling of negative or difficult emotions.

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 Those of you online, see if you can put one in the chat box

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 is different from what you heard.

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 I could think of, oh, entitlement.

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 It's not quite an emotion, but when you're feeling entitled

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 and you kind of feel superior a little bit,

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 a little bit maybe contemptuous towards others.

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 I'd say that's a negative emotion.

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 It's not very pleasant to feel it.

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 It might feel a little bit pleasant at first.

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 Like, oh, I could have done that better.

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 Now it might give us a little bit of an ego stroke.

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 But then because most of us are pretty decent people,

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 it might then turn to feeling a little bit yucky.

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 Frustration. Frustration is a beautiful hidden anger.

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 It's not really hidden, but we call it frustration and we usually differentiate it from anger or rage.

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 But it's anger, wearing a gentler coat, frustration. About grief, grief, we had sadness.

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 They're about grief. What about shame? Thank you. That's a big guilt.

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 guilt. I was speaking to a wonderful young woman today who after many years of contemplation

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 and many months of us working on this, she's decided to in my view to do something very wholesome,

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 which is that it's a completely firm boundary to cut out of her life a family member who is very

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 manipulative and has been very abusive and who because of her huge heart and her huge compassion,

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 she kept wanting to try to give an inch and they would take 14 miles and she says I know it's the

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 right thing to do on completely at ease with the decision and she has set that boundary and the

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 person's very upset and she said I still feel guilty and this is a clean cut. I've been

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 gently opening up the encouragement for months for her to cut this person off. It's pretty

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 black and white from my view in terms of the inability of said person to change to grow or to

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 take any ownership. But because she's a decent and loving person, she's experiencing guilt even

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 though she says I know I shouldn't feel guilty, but she's compassionate. She doesn't want someone

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 to feel badly, even when that person's impact in her life and her family's like it's so negative

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 that they need to be owned. Yeah, negative emotions. Okay, how about positive emotions? There's

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 lots and lots of those. I'd love to hear some flavors, Shelley. Joy, happiness.

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 What was that? Wonder. Yeah, I'll all accept wonder as said

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 of one minute. Ah, right? Being opened up and just in the beauty of things or how amazing

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 that creativity is. Sure, Neil. I would carry awesome curiosity also one of the seven factors

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 of enlightenment. Bing, bing, bing, bing, bing. Oppositive emotion. Don't overthink it.

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 Last or good? I think she meant love, but that's okay. And again, online, anything online, different

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 excitement. Pride, yeah, grounded pride. Yes, grounded pride is very, very welcome in

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 buddha dharma, which is, you know, a gentle pride at something we do well. If you're a terrific grandma,

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 have some gentle pride in that. If you're a skilled musician, have some gentle pride in that.

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 Yeah, that's a positive emotion when handled beautifully. Yeah. Blissfulness, also a factor of

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 enlightenment. Bliss in the mind, in buddha dharma, when the mind is in rarefied and healthy states,

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 can be just a subtle, gentle sense of contentment, or it can be almost overwhelming, bliss joy,

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 happiness. Yeah, love, patience, I'd say patience is a positive emotion when we organically feel

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 patient. It feels really nice. When we're needing to apply patience, there may be frustration

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 that we're working with, which is also important. But when the frustration melts away and there's

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 actually some ease and some patience, I'm feeling pretty patient with the beat. Other days, I might

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 not know. Right? So just an idea of emotions. Well, in buddha dharma, there are three root negative

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 emotions. You should all be able to chant this in unison, greed, hatred, and delusion. All of

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 the negative emotions fit into one of those categories. We won't go into that in a lot of detail

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 I hope to see you today.

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 But there are how many positive emotions in Buddha Dharma?

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 There are four.

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 Kind of love that there's three negative and four positive.

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 It's already got the edge.

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 So in Buddha Dharma, to repeat, the three negative emotions are grouped into greed, the

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 whole wanting, longing, selfishness, pride, ego, all of that kind of I want, I want, I want.

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 Right?

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 You're very familiar with that.

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 Unless you're brand new in which case, welcome to a super important grounding fundamentals

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 class.

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 The second is anger, frustration, hatred, rage, vague irritations, light, dislike, all that

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 pushing away energy.

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 And the third is in the delusion, confusion, ignorance, not knowing stupidly chasing shiny

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 objects and the belief having an expensive car will actually make us happy, question mark,

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 it won't.

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 It might be pleasant for a day or a week or a month, I'm not denying that, but it's not

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 the source of wealth, and I want to focus more tonight on the four positive emotions.

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 And then talk about in our felt experience, how is an emotion built?

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 What are the components that come together to have the thing that feels like a me experience

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 something that feels like an emotion?

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 So put a little pin in that for a few minutes and we'll get to that.

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 The four positive emotions according to the Buddha are what the fundamental nature of

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 your mind and my mind and all minds are.

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 So if all the clouds dissolve, the beautiful, infinite blue sky mind would experience the

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 human being engaging in that mind would experience only four emotions, the four Brahma,

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 the Hara's, or the four noble minds, dates for Hara means a house or a dwelling and Brahma

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 means like a brahma, like a high level, noble.

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 So, the elevated house or the elevated abode would be the four high-level, holy, precious

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 maybe, the noble mind states, the noble abodes where you want your mind to dwell.

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 Do you want your mind to dwell in, you know, bitter land and the apartment of negativity

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 in the neighborhood of, "I hate everybody and I'm selfish of course not."

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 We may sometimes visit that place, I do too.

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 But we want our minds to dwell in these four noble abodes, the first one, and these will be

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 very familiar to most of you.

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 The first one is loving kindness, it's meta, loving kindness, and it's important to differentiate

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 this from what we might think of as love, love for a spouse, love for a child, love

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 for a cat or a dog, love for a friend, these are good things.

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 But the love we feel for our dear ones tends to come mixed with attachment.

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 It tends to come mixed with clinging, that's extremely normal, I forbid anybody to beat

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 yourself up if you feel some clinging to your loved ones, you don't want them to leave,

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 you don't want them to die, you don't want them to not want what you want and get in line,

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 but on board, get with the program, husband, there's clinging involved, meta, love.

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 Loving kindness is expansive, it is all inclusive, and it is love, friendliness, and kindness

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 without clinging, write that down.

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 It is love, friendliness, and kindness without clinging, what does that mean?

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 That means, as impossible as this may sound off the top, it means that you, you, not you,

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 would have a sense of benevolent loving, friendliness towards all beings.

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 An equal, expansive kindness, affection, without clinging, and a friendliness to your most beloved

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 friends, children, family members, and to your enemies, and to people you may have strong

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 negative feelings about when there's clouds in that sky.

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 That when the clouds dissolve, there could be benevolent, abundant, loving kindness,

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 metta for all beings.

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 Now I struggle with that, right?

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 I have negative feelings about some beings, certain world leaders these days, where, from

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 my limited view, it seems like there's a fair bit of greed, hate, and delusion be playing

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 out in ways that is literally killing people, and so much more.

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 I have an acquaintance who's a trans person, transition from a male body to female identity

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 and body, and they were part of a really important program in a certain American state

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 in a certain American college up until a couple of years ago, where they ran an LGBTQ

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+ center, and did marvelous work and wonderful programs, and all the funding was cut when

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 the government outlawed such things and said diversity and inclusion programs no longer

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 exists.

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 They lost their job, which they can certainly leave with, but they lost the ability to support

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 those youth.

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 That makes this human heart sad.

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 So it's difficult for me to feel an open blue sky, loving kindness for all beings, but

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 we cultivate it.

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 Let me be really careful here.

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 This teaching does not mean, therefore excuse, therefore be complacent, therefore do nothing,

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 therefore say yes, so be it, no, no, but when we meet ugliness with our own internal ugly

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 If I allow my own internal righteousness and anger around any isms and particularly dear to this

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 heart happens to be homophobia and isms toward LGBTQ+ Rainbow Folk, if I allow my own hurt,

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 my own anger, my own self-righteousness, my judgment, even if it is, I think, rooted in goodness

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 to allow me to feel anger and hatred or frustration, then I am arguably worse than the offenders

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 that may sound like a strong statement because it is. The Buddha said to his monks and lay

00:18:39.440 --> 00:18:45.760
 persons when they were very angry. I don't remember the exact precise details of this particular

00:18:45.760 --> 00:18:51.600
 story, but I'm going to get it pretty close, I think. A person came to the Buddha and tried to harm

00:18:51.600 --> 00:18:58.240
 the Buddha, and the monks and lay persons around the Buddha were horrified and they felt a lot of

00:18:58.240 --> 00:19:03.040
 anger toward this being, and the Buddha taught along the lines of, "I'll look up the sutra, I'll

00:19:03.040 --> 00:19:10.000
 share it in one of our next classes." But the Buddha said, "This person that tried to harm me did not

00:19:10.000 --> 00:19:18.800
 offend me," and he turned to his students and said, "You, however, offend me because you know better,

00:19:18.800 --> 00:19:26.320
 and for you to have anger and hatred towards that being who is defiled and confused, that harms me,

00:19:26.320 --> 00:19:33.840
 that hurts me." Wow, that's a pretty great teaching of the ability to have kindness

00:19:33.840 --> 00:19:42.320
 toward a person who in states of greed, hate, or delusion is creating unwholesome or worse acts.

00:19:42.320 --> 00:19:48.480
 Please understand that doesn't mean you condone them. If we could act from love and compassion

00:19:48.480 --> 00:19:56.560
 and ferocity, what the Tibetans call wrathful compassion, we'd say, "I've compassion for the fact

00:19:56.560 --> 00:20:00.160
 that these beings are very deluded and they're lashing out."

00:20:00.000 --> 00:20:05.200
 out of their own total confusion. However, I will do almost anything I can to prevent it,

00:20:05.200 --> 00:20:10.800
 to change it, and to protect beings that are being assaulted by this, and so on.

00:20:10.800 --> 00:20:17.920
 So maybe don't start with your biggest enemies. Maybe start with someone in your circle,

00:20:17.920 --> 00:20:24.640
 who you find a little tiresome. You find a little challenging. You find a little bit difficult.

00:20:24.640 --> 00:20:29.200
 You find a little annoying. They're not annoying. They're just them, and it's just data.

00:20:29.200 --> 00:20:34.000
 But your mind finds it annoying, and your mind reacts to them with a sense of annoyance,

00:20:34.000 --> 00:20:38.320
 and we then project it on them and say they're annoying. There's a single annoying person

00:20:38.320 --> 00:20:46.800
 on the planet. This buzz isn't annoying. It all? In fact, it's wholesome. It's an alarm to tell us

00:20:46.800 --> 00:20:52.480
 to be careful that something's wrong. Help us reset things so they're safe and good again.

00:20:52.480 --> 00:20:58.400
 This alarm is our friend. But the mind, hypothetically, could find it annoying game.

00:20:58.400 --> 00:21:05.920
 There are times where my mind would be almost jumping out of its skin, so to speak, at that

00:21:05.920 --> 00:21:13.520
 noise, which is simply a phenomenon. It's simply the arising and passing away of sound.

00:21:14.080 --> 00:21:23.120
 It is simply auditory data. If that same sound was, I don't know, the melody of a Tibetan

00:21:23.120 --> 00:21:28.880
 gawl, a Tibetan singing bowl. At the same rhythm is now, but it was like bong.

00:21:28.880 --> 00:21:38.720
 Most minds in ears listening would find that less annoying.

00:21:43.360 --> 00:21:50.480
 I guess love the alarm and see any emotional reaction. I don't know how loud it is at home,

00:21:50.480 --> 00:21:54.880
 but it's loud here. I'm going to wrap my puppy coat around it to try to buffer it and help

00:21:54.880 --> 00:22:21.040
 it a little bit. But it's loud. If anything,

00:22:00.000 --> 00:22:07.440
 Anyone's minds online or in this room are feeling a little ruffled, a little perturbed,

00:22:07.440 --> 00:22:13.680
 maybe a bit irritable, a bit distressed, even it's a bit of a harsh, not so nice for the

00:22:13.680 --> 00:22:15.120
 central nervous system sound.

00:22:15.120 --> 00:22:17.120
 Alarms aren't meant to be melodic.

00:22:17.120 --> 00:22:19.160
 They're meant to alarm.

00:22:19.160 --> 00:22:20.160
 They're meant to penetrate.

00:22:20.160 --> 00:22:21.160
 They're meant to wake up.

00:22:21.160 --> 00:22:23.080
 They're meant to say, "This is unpleasant.

00:22:23.080 --> 00:22:26.200
 It moves me to go do something about it."

00:22:26.200 --> 00:22:32.920
 So the design for the human ear to be unpleasant and that's doing a job or not, what

00:22:32.920 --> 00:22:37.240
 if we're the first group of people in the history of the world that could sit here with

00:22:37.240 --> 00:22:42.320
 that going on and just go, "It's just phenomenal."

00:22:42.320 --> 00:22:52.480
 It's just a strong way because mind is not reacting with it.

00:22:52.480 --> 00:22:55.960
 This mind is not reacting with we've made good or dilution.

00:22:55.960 --> 00:23:05.680
 This mind is unruffled by the unexpected and by something that could be experienced

00:23:05.680 --> 00:23:06.800
 as unpleasant.

00:23:06.800 --> 00:23:13.040
 And if any of you online are being bothered by it and you decide to leave the class because

00:23:13.040 --> 00:23:17.000
 of it, came on you because we're all stuck with it.

00:23:17.000 --> 00:23:21.760
 Stay with the team, my friends, stay with the team.

00:23:21.760 --> 00:23:29.920
 So the first of the four noble minds states, the four states that a Buddha would experience

00:23:29.920 --> 00:23:35.320
 exclusively, the emotions a Buddha would experience exclusively would be these four.

00:23:35.320 --> 00:23:39.320
 I've only said one so far, so I'll run through all four quickly and I'll talk a little

00:23:39.320 --> 00:23:44.600
 bit about each of them and then I'm going to talk about how the being non-being constulated

00:23:44.600 --> 00:23:51.720
 self creates emotion, creates a little tricky here, but I'm going to stand by it for now.

00:23:51.720 --> 00:24:21.720
 Loving kindness, meta, compassion, coruna, empathetic joy or friendliness or

00:24:00.000 --> 00:24:04.700
 of celebration, moodita, and equanimity.

00:24:04.700 --> 00:24:06.960
 It's translated a couple of different ways.

00:24:06.960 --> 00:24:09.560
 I can't think of the main one right now.

00:24:09.560 --> 00:24:13.160
 Tetra mojahita upecca is the main one.

00:24:13.160 --> 00:24:16.040
 We would use in this constellation, upecca.

00:24:16.040 --> 00:24:17.360
 Equanimity, so backwards now.

00:24:17.360 --> 00:24:20.960
 Equanimity, empathetic or sympathetic joy,

00:24:20.960 --> 00:24:25.120
 compassion, and meta loving kindness.

00:24:25.120 --> 00:24:26.240
 I spoke a bit about meta.

00:24:26.240 --> 00:24:29.480
 The key teaching there is it's loving friendliness

00:24:29.480 --> 00:24:30.440
 without clinging.

00:24:30.440 --> 00:24:32.400
 Good luck with that.

00:24:32.400 --> 00:24:34.560
 But we can work to reduce our clinging.

00:24:34.560 --> 00:24:37.640
 We can work to reduce our preferential treatment

00:24:37.640 --> 00:24:40.240
 of where we spread our loving kindness.

00:24:40.240 --> 00:24:43.920
 I'll spread it to you, not you, not you, and you.

00:24:43.920 --> 00:24:47.040
 That's a little more like our felt experience most days,

00:24:47.040 --> 00:24:50.240
 I find, for most of us, so we can work on that.

00:24:50.240 --> 00:24:53.320
 The second one, compassion deserves a whole retreat

00:24:53.320 --> 00:24:56.360
 of its own, and it'll get one one of these days.

00:24:56.360 --> 00:24:57.280
 It has in the past.

00:24:57.280 --> 00:25:01.200
 But compassion, I'll just review some teachings for some

00:25:01.200 --> 00:25:04.120
 of you, and maybe introduce it fresh for others.

00:25:04.120 --> 00:25:12.600
 Compassion is essentially a three step or a three aspect,

00:25:12.600 --> 00:25:15.600
 emotion, or feeling, or experience, or action,

00:25:15.600 --> 00:25:18.000
 which is first to notice suffering,

00:25:18.000 --> 00:25:20.680
 second to be moved by the suffering,

00:25:20.680 --> 00:25:22.560
 mostly touched and moved by it,

00:25:22.560 --> 00:25:26.200
 to have it make an impact on oneself on one's empathetic self,

00:25:26.200 --> 00:25:30.600
 and the third is to be moved to try to reduce the suffering.

00:25:30.600 --> 00:25:33.800
 So, oh my goodness, that's terrible, isn't compassion,

00:25:33.800 --> 00:25:36.000
 it's not bad, it's a decent start.

00:25:36.000 --> 00:25:39.400
 That's more pity, like that is terrible.

00:25:39.400 --> 00:25:42.640
 Maybe we're a bit affected by it, and then we move on.

00:25:42.640 --> 00:25:46.240
 Don't be yourself up, that still means you're not a monster.

00:25:46.240 --> 00:25:51.240
 But compassion is to notice and to be moved by it,

00:25:51.240 --> 00:25:54.760
 to be mostly affected by it towards a sense of empathy,

00:25:54.760 --> 00:25:59.760
 compassion, or desire to then help to reduce the suffering.

00:26:00.000 --> 00:26:03.400
 That doesn't mean we will always act on it.

00:26:03.400 --> 00:26:06.280
 If we were all to try to act on all the things

00:26:06.280 --> 00:26:09.720
 that create compassion in us, we couldn't.

00:26:09.720 --> 00:26:11.880
 Any animal suffering, any child suffering,

00:26:11.880 --> 00:26:15.240
 any human being suffering, any war-torn country,

00:26:15.240 --> 00:26:19.080
 anyone struggling with anxiety, oh my goodness,

00:26:19.080 --> 00:26:22.720
 we might be moved by that and have an idea we want to help,

00:26:22.720 --> 00:26:24.880
 we can't help all the people all the time.

00:26:25.880 --> 00:26:30.320
 But compassion is different from even sympathy.

00:26:30.320 --> 00:26:32.760
 Sympathy has a subtle quality,

00:26:32.760 --> 00:26:33.960
 and these are just words,

00:26:33.960 --> 00:26:36.520
 and you may interpret them differently, which is fine.

00:26:36.520 --> 00:26:39.160
 But generally, how in glutadarma,

00:26:39.160 --> 00:26:41.280
 we differentiate a sense of sympathy

00:26:41.280 --> 00:26:45.040
 from a sense of compassion is sympathy is,

00:26:45.040 --> 00:26:47.640
 oh, that I feel so badly for you,

00:26:47.640 --> 00:26:51.400
 which is fairly decent thing to feel.

00:26:51.400 --> 00:26:54.840
 But there's this subtle, you're different than me.

00:26:54.840 --> 00:26:57.960
 Not ego, nothing strong, it's very subtle.

00:26:57.960 --> 00:26:59.680
 I feel sorry for you.

00:26:59.680 --> 00:27:03.000
 There's a quality of forgetting

00:27:03.000 --> 00:27:06.280
 that we're human and anything can happen to us.

00:27:06.280 --> 00:27:09.440
 Where compassion is, this is so awful

00:27:09.440 --> 00:27:11.360
 that you've been diagnosed with cancer

00:27:11.360 --> 00:27:12.560
 and it deeply feels for you,

00:27:12.560 --> 00:27:13.760
 and I'm aware it could happen to me

00:27:13.760 --> 00:27:16.160
 or anyone that's universal.

00:27:16.160 --> 00:27:17.760
 So it's a little bit different.

00:27:17.760 --> 00:27:19.600
 We can go more into that another time.

00:27:20.600 --> 00:27:25.120
 So Mudita, excuse me, Karuna, compassion.

00:27:25.120 --> 00:27:27.200
 Karuna, these are the poly words I'm saying,

00:27:27.200 --> 00:27:28.600
 if you don't know what that is.

00:27:28.600 --> 00:27:30.840
 That's the language that was spoken at the time

00:27:30.840 --> 00:27:33.680
 of the Buddha and the original language.

00:27:33.680 --> 00:27:35.160
 These words would have been taught

00:27:35.160 --> 00:27:37.520
 and that have been translated into English.

00:27:37.520 --> 00:27:42.160
 So we've got loving kindness, we've got compassion,

00:27:42.160 --> 00:27:45.080
 which of course can lead to us, frankly,

00:27:45.080 --> 00:27:46.840
 being better people,

00:27:46.840 --> 00:27:48.560
 being kinder and more compassionate,

00:27:48.560 --> 00:27:51.560
 being moved to help, being moved to serve.

00:27:51.560 --> 00:27:53.040
 There needs to be boundaries in this

00:27:53.040 --> 00:27:55.680
 to use a more Western and psychological term.

00:27:55.680 --> 00:27:57.440
 There needs to be wisdom in this

00:27:57.440 --> 00:28:00.080
 or you'll end up in what used to be called burnout.

00:28:00.000 --> 00:28:02.640
 And I prefer the term that was used five years ago,

00:28:02.640 --> 00:28:05.160
 may still be popular, I'm not sure Neil might know,

00:28:05.160 --> 00:28:06.960
 but compassion fatigue.

00:28:06.960 --> 00:28:08.840
 So we say, you know, caregiver burnout,

00:28:08.840 --> 00:28:12.280
 or teach your burnout, or mom or dad burnout,

00:28:12.280 --> 00:28:15.640
 compassion fatigue, I think, captures it better.

00:28:15.640 --> 00:28:19.440
 Where one gives and gives, and maybe gives so much,

00:28:19.440 --> 00:28:21.360
 and doesn't have replenishment time,

00:28:21.360 --> 00:28:23.960
 doesn't have enough, what might be called self-care,

00:28:23.960 --> 00:28:28.280
 doesn't have enough wisdom to draw from the well of Tara

00:28:28.280 --> 00:28:31.480
 before it runs dry, and then offer water to others,

00:28:31.480 --> 00:28:33.480
 metaphorically or literally.

00:28:33.480 --> 00:28:36.840
 And that can lead to compassion fatigue.

00:28:36.840 --> 00:28:38.360
 Doesn't mean the compassion's dead,

00:28:38.360 --> 00:28:40.640
 and it doesn't mean the being isn't compassionate,

00:28:40.640 --> 00:28:44.160
 but they may need to practice self-compassion.

00:28:44.160 --> 00:28:46.560
 They may need to pull out for a while.

00:28:46.560 --> 00:28:49.320
 They may need to take a leap of absence for a while.

00:28:49.320 --> 00:28:52.520
 They may need to say, I'm not taking on any clients

00:28:52.520 --> 00:28:56.760
 for a month or two, I need a little bit of self-care time.

00:28:56.760 --> 00:29:01.760
 So idiot compassion, which is a Tibetan translation,

00:29:01.760 --> 00:29:05.360
 is I'll just give all to everybody

00:29:05.360 --> 00:29:08.440
 and know, worry about me, which is martyrdom,

00:29:08.440 --> 00:29:11.480
 which is throwing yourself on the ground to serve others,

00:29:11.480 --> 00:29:14.520
 which isn't very helpful if you die on that ground,

00:29:14.520 --> 00:29:18.400
 which more helpful is if you go take some time

00:29:18.400 --> 00:29:20.720
 and replenish and walk in the deafadills

00:29:20.720 --> 00:29:24.520
 and hug your friends, and maybe read some silly books,

00:29:24.520 --> 00:29:26.560
 and study some drama, and go on a retreat,

00:29:26.560 --> 00:29:28.000
 and practice some yoga,

00:29:28.000 --> 00:29:31.480
 fill in all sorts of nurturing qualities here,

00:29:31.480 --> 00:29:35.920
 and then have the well replenished

00:29:35.920 --> 00:29:39.720
 to continue to act with compassion.

00:29:39.720 --> 00:29:43.520
 Loving kindness, compassion, moodita.

00:29:43.520 --> 00:29:45.960
 moodita is a bit of an interesting one,

00:29:45.960 --> 00:29:49.240
 and it's usually translated as sympathetic joy,

00:29:49.240 --> 00:29:52.480
 which I don't care for that translation very much.

00:29:52.480 --> 00:29:54.360
 I think, not just me,

00:29:54.360 --> 00:29:57.800
 but I think that a more evocative translation

00:29:57.800 --> 00:29:59.800
 is empathetic joy.

00:30:00.000 --> 00:30:02.480
 But the again has that bit of all poor you.

00:30:02.480 --> 00:30:04.920
 It's just an English word, but words are important.

00:30:04.920 --> 00:30:06.640
 And if sympathy brings up kind of a,

00:30:06.640 --> 00:30:07.640
 I feel sorry for you.

00:30:07.640 --> 00:30:09.840
 That's not the quality we're after.

00:30:09.840 --> 00:30:13.200
 Empathy, I think for most of us brings up a different quality

00:30:13.200 --> 00:30:15.600
 of, you know, I have empathy for that.

00:30:15.600 --> 00:30:17.000
 It's a bit different from compassion.

00:30:17.000 --> 00:30:18.840
 That's a little hair splitting for tonight.

00:30:18.840 --> 00:30:20.320
 We'll leave it for now.

00:30:20.320 --> 00:30:24.080
 But empathetic joy is the ability to feel joy

00:30:24.080 --> 00:30:26.800
 for others when good things befall them.

00:30:27.800 --> 00:30:30.280
 And most of us think, oh, that sounds pretty easy.

00:30:30.280 --> 00:30:33.200
 I'm happy for my children, my grandchildren, my friends,

00:30:33.200 --> 00:30:36.040
 my coworkers when good things happen, and that is true.

00:30:36.040 --> 00:30:41.000
 But I think most of us can relate to the following

00:30:41.000 --> 00:30:43.480
 where something good happens to someone you love

00:30:43.480 --> 00:30:45.360
 and you're glad it happened for them.

00:30:45.360 --> 00:30:49.040
 But there can be a little of what about me.

00:30:49.040 --> 00:30:53.120
 Like I'm so happy that you got this wonderful promotion

00:30:53.120 --> 00:30:54.520
 in your field.

00:30:54.520 --> 00:30:56.400
 I sure wish I could get a promotion.

00:30:56.400 --> 00:30:59.080
 And that's not because you're a selfish jerk at all.

00:30:59.080 --> 00:31:02.520
 And so you're truly are happy for your friend,

00:31:02.520 --> 00:31:03.320
 your loved one.

00:31:03.320 --> 00:31:05.480
 And there's this bit of ego, though,

00:31:05.480 --> 00:31:08.360
 that wishes that could happen for you too.

00:31:08.360 --> 00:31:09.200
 Right?

00:31:09.200 --> 00:31:11.880
 If your friend won a lottery tomorrow and won a million dollars

00:31:11.880 --> 00:31:13.240
 and you're struggling financially,

00:31:13.240 --> 00:31:14.880
 I hope you'd have your first flush

00:31:14.880 --> 00:31:16.480
 to be, oh my goodness, that's thrilling.

00:31:16.480 --> 00:31:17.560
 I'm so happy for you.

00:31:17.560 --> 00:31:19.200
 But for most of us, human beings,

00:31:19.200 --> 00:31:21.160
 if we're struggling financially in particular,

00:31:21.160 --> 00:31:22.760
 there'd be a little bit of, oh boy,

00:31:22.760 --> 00:31:24.320
 I wish that could happen to me too.

00:31:24.320 --> 00:31:26.240
 Not like I want to take it away from you.

00:31:26.240 --> 00:31:28.920
 That's a bit of a jerkier level that we could also feel.

00:31:28.920 --> 00:31:30.480
 But I'm glad that happened for you

00:31:30.480 --> 00:31:33.320
 and I wish I could have that happen to me.

00:31:33.320 --> 00:31:36.640
 Another one is if you are going through a difficult heartbreak

00:31:36.640 --> 00:31:39.640
 or a loss of a partner, maybe through death as well.

00:31:39.640 --> 00:31:42.680
 And your friend is embarking on a wonderful,

00:31:42.680 --> 00:31:44.200
 wholesome, healthy love affair.

00:31:44.200 --> 00:31:46.640
 And you're truly glad for him, her or them.

00:31:46.640 --> 00:31:48.960
 You really are, but there's a little bit of pie.

00:31:48.960 --> 00:31:51.080
 I'd like that too.

00:31:51.080 --> 00:31:56.040
 So this empathetic joy is simply feeling the first part

00:31:56.040 --> 00:31:59.760
 without any little clench about what about me.

00:31:59.760 --> 00:32:00.600
 And I--

00:32:00.000 --> 00:32:04.560
 I'm not there yet all the time. I doubt any of you are. And if so, I bow to that beauty,

00:32:04.560 --> 00:32:11.520
 but it's the ability to just be happy for the fortune of others, to be happy for the happiness of

00:32:11.520 --> 00:32:16.960
 others, to have empathy and delight in the happiness, the awakening, the kindness, the good

00:32:16.960 --> 00:32:24.160
 fortune of others, without that little me ego piece making it like a little step or a terrible

00:32:24.160 --> 00:32:29.680
 step of jealousy of envy of actually evolving into hatred. Why did they get so lucky? It's not

00:32:29.680 --> 00:32:35.360
 fair. It can obviously lead to kinds of passion and murder and all sorts of things. I want what

00:32:35.360 --> 00:32:43.520
 they have. There's the deep pendulums swing away from it into the dark side. So, love and kindness,

00:32:43.520 --> 00:32:53.280
 compassion, empathetic joy, happiness for the happiness of others. And then equanimity. Now equanimity

00:32:54.480 --> 00:33:01.280
 is a funny little beast, an interesting beast, a really interesting concept. And the one I personally

00:33:01.280 --> 00:33:07.920
 struggled the most with when I was in my first year, five or ten years of dharma, because I didn't

00:33:07.920 --> 00:33:18.960
 understand it properly. Equanimity means upecca to be with things as they are. To be with things

00:33:18.960 --> 00:33:25.760
 as they are. I used to call it, I won't be as crasses I used to be, but I used to call it

00:33:25.760 --> 00:33:35.440
 equifricanimity, because I didn't see how this was helpful and I'll explain why. Equanimity,

00:33:35.440 --> 00:33:41.200
 I misinterpreted as a type of giving up her complacency, completely my misunderstanding. The Buddha

00:33:41.200 --> 00:33:46.400
 doesn't do that. But to me, what do you mean be with things as they are? Like just accept bad things

00:33:46.400 --> 00:33:52.720
 are happening, just accept that I won't list them. But XYZ happens and that happens and this happens,

00:33:52.720 --> 00:33:59.920
 just accept that certain acceptance, I don't want to just accept it. I want to take

00:34:00.000 --> 00:34:03.840
 compassion to action, to help, to change it, to stand up,

00:34:03.840 --> 00:34:08.640
 to create petitions, to protest, to try to dialogue

00:34:08.640 --> 00:34:10.920
 with beings who might believe something

00:34:10.920 --> 00:34:13.360
 that is based in greed, hatred, and delusion,

00:34:13.360 --> 00:34:15.720
 and to try to help them find their hearts.

00:34:15.720 --> 00:34:19.200
 I don't want to just go, ah, so it is, baby!

00:34:19.200 --> 00:34:23.480
 - Which was my misinterpretation of what equanimity was,

00:34:23.480 --> 00:34:25.880
 is and how it's taught in the Buddha, Dharma,

00:34:25.880 --> 00:34:27.720
 and other excellent traditions.

00:34:27.720 --> 00:34:31.880
 This is the being with the truth of the way things are first.

00:34:31.880 --> 00:34:35.120
 So right now, there's a war happening,

00:34:35.120 --> 00:34:36.800
 probably many more than one,

00:34:36.800 --> 00:34:40.520
 but there's one that the United States leaders have started.

00:34:40.520 --> 00:34:41.680
 With that's good, bad, or indifferent,

00:34:41.680 --> 00:34:43.800
 I don't know, I'm not a politician,

00:34:43.800 --> 00:34:45.000
 but I have my opinions.

00:34:45.000 --> 00:34:49.160
 There's child poverty, there's, you know,

00:34:49.160 --> 00:34:50.200
 let's not make the litany,

00:34:50.200 --> 00:34:52.480
 but we can just draw a litany, a litany.

00:34:52.480 --> 00:34:54.480
 There's enough food on planet Earth,

00:34:54.480 --> 00:34:58.320
 and there always has been to feed every single person,

00:34:58.320 --> 00:35:01.600
 even now alive on planet Earth, that's completely factual.

00:35:01.600 --> 00:35:03.440
 It's the way it is, it's the truth.

00:35:03.440 --> 00:35:05.640
 There is enough food on this planet to feed each

00:35:05.640 --> 00:35:07.080
 and every person, yet children,

00:35:07.080 --> 00:35:09.880
 die of starvation every single day.

00:35:09.880 --> 00:35:11.720
 How could we be with that as it is?

00:35:11.720 --> 00:35:14.800
 If it means, oh well, but it doesn't.

00:35:14.800 --> 00:35:17.200
 It means, let's take that one.

00:35:17.200 --> 00:35:19.680
 The fact that people still die of starvation

00:35:19.680 --> 00:35:21.680
 on this planet when they don't need to.

00:35:23.720 --> 00:35:27.600
 Until we approach that with equanimity,

00:35:27.600 --> 00:35:31.560
 until we approach it with the simple acceptance

00:35:31.560 --> 00:35:33.560
 of this is currently how it is.

00:35:33.560 --> 00:35:37.120
 It's very difficult for us to move forward

00:35:37.120 --> 00:35:39.520
 in this spirit of compassion

00:35:39.520 --> 00:35:42.200
 to join the World Food Project,

00:35:42.200 --> 00:35:44.440
 to start here at home in Enaimo,

00:35:44.440 --> 00:35:46.880
 Cauchy and Valley, wherever you're all from,

00:35:46.880 --> 00:35:51.880
 to choose one small project that you could even do yourself.

00:35:52.120 --> 00:35:54.080
 Maybe yourself and two friends could choose

00:35:54.080 --> 00:35:57.560
 one kindergarten class in an underprivileged area

00:35:57.560 --> 00:36:00.200
 of your town and start a breakfast program.

00:36:00.000 --> 00:36:04.880
 Right? What could we do? But when we are raging against the machine,

00:36:04.880 --> 00:36:10.840
 it's good band, by the way, when we are not accepting the truth of hunger,

00:36:10.840 --> 00:36:14.420
 when we're not accepting and willing to look at the fact that children go to

00:36:14.420 --> 00:36:20.120
 school, hungry in our abundant communities where there's enough food to feed

00:36:20.120 --> 00:36:25.920
 everybody right here, South Island, for goodness sakes, we're not under a drought,

00:36:25.920 --> 00:36:31.880
 we're not under a war, we're not under a supply chain problem, and yet people in

00:36:31.880 --> 00:36:39.560
 this community are hungry. Children are going to school with empty bellies.

00:36:39.560 --> 00:36:50.040
 Equanimity is to accept the truth of that first, and then, without anger, without hatred,

00:36:50.040 --> 00:36:57.480
 without rage, without raging against the machine, to say, "This is unwholesome,

00:36:57.480 --> 00:37:03.720
 I see it as it is," and to be moved through loving kindness, compassion, to make a

00:37:03.720 --> 00:37:07.240
 difference, I've just described how. Tomorrow morning, because it's probably

00:37:07.240 --> 00:37:13.960
 closed tonight, we could all send a check, I'm so old, make an E transfer, use

00:37:13.960 --> 00:37:19.360
 PayPal, and send money to our local food bank, or school food program, or we can go

00:37:19.360 --> 00:37:22.640
 volunteer, we could go drop off some food, and how about we don't just drop off

00:37:22.640 --> 00:37:26.720
 things that aren't all that palatable, and are inexpensive, drop those off the

00:37:26.720 --> 00:37:31.360
 basics, the beans, the cantina, great, but what about dropping off yummy or

00:37:31.360 --> 00:37:38.440
 stuff? What about dropping off really lovely things as well? But when we do that

00:37:38.440 --> 00:37:43.120
 out of exhaustion, out of guilt, out of fear, out of rage, out of our own

00:37:43.120 --> 00:37:48.600
 confusion, it's still good we take action, but it's tainted versus if you can

00:37:48.600 --> 00:37:53.720
 take compassion, action, out of an acceptance of the way things are, which

00:37:53.720 --> 00:37:57.000
 doesn't mean we accept that they should just stay this way because of this

00:37:57.000 --> 00:38:01.880
 way, is I see that this is true at this

00:38:00.000 --> 00:38:07.280
 time. How can I ideally take compassion and action to change it to improve it? I say this

00:38:07.280 --> 00:38:14.160
 over and over again, but the serenity prayer is one of the greatest poems or prayers about

00:38:14.160 --> 00:38:21.120
 equanimity in different language, right? God or Buddha or universe, grant me the courage to change

00:38:21.120 --> 00:38:28.240
 the things I can to accept the things I can't and the wisdom to know the difference. Grant me

00:38:28.240 --> 00:38:34.640
 the courage to change the things I can with compassion. Grant me the courage to accept the

00:38:34.640 --> 00:38:42.480
 things I cannot change equanimity and the wisdom to know the difference. Where do we put our energy?

00:38:42.480 --> 00:38:47.600
 Don't bang it against the wall that's not going to change in the near future. Put that

00:38:47.600 --> 00:38:53.280
 compassionate energy in the other place where this room for movement, this room for growth.

00:38:53.280 --> 00:39:00.000
 I hope that makes sense. Those are the four positive emotions and I look forward to the day,

00:39:00.000 --> 00:39:07.200
 maybe it's tomorrow, maybe it's tonight where we become fully awake Buddhas and the only four

00:39:07.200 --> 00:39:15.440
 emotions or mind states we ever experience are the four noble mind states. Imagine navigating life

00:39:15.440 --> 00:39:23.440
 that way. Imagine how non-reactive you'd be. I've had the pleasure, as probably many of you have,

00:39:23.440 --> 00:39:30.080
 to see the Dalai Lama teach on a number of occasions in San Francisco and Vancouver a couple times,

00:39:30.080 --> 00:39:37.440
 ten-day Kalashakra in Washington and the most fun of all was Inbogaya, India in the place where

00:39:37.440 --> 00:39:43.200
 the Buddha became enlightened under the tree. There's a clipping from the original tree that

00:39:43.200 --> 00:39:49.200
 they regrew and is a giant tree there. We were able to sit and meditate under it during a

00:39:49.200 --> 00:39:54.960
 full moon night hoping we'd get awakened to. It didn't happen yet, but it was still worth trying

00:39:54.960 --> 00:40:20.720
 and to try and try it again. The Dalai Lama is a

00:40:00.000 --> 00:40:04.560
 a pretty humorous guy, right? He chuckles a lot if you've ever seen him and I

00:40:04.560 --> 00:40:08.760
 gonna ruin this for you and I apologize in advance. His chuckle sounds a lot to

00:40:08.760 --> 00:40:13.000
 me like Gonzo from Sesame Street. Now next time you hear it you're gonna go

00:40:13.000 --> 00:40:20.840
 oh she moved it for me. Oh I can see it's good. And I believe in my very limited

00:40:20.840 --> 00:40:24.680
 knowledge that if the Dalai Lama were here tonight he'd be laughing at this

00:40:24.680 --> 00:40:31.960
 sound. Oh this is your mind. What shall you do with the mind, right? I doubt he'd

00:40:31.960 --> 00:40:35.720
 be like darn it. I came all the way to Nanaima, I'm gonna teach him this is a

00:40:35.720 --> 00:40:41.240
 annoying thing going on. Okay? It'd be cool if the first sentence was literally I

00:40:41.240 --> 00:40:47.320
 came all the way to Nanaima to teach you. We all go wild! Maybe Island

00:40:47.320 --> 00:40:56.560
 garbage should offer to host him. He's probably a wee bit busy but I'm now

00:40:56.560 --> 00:41:01.720
 going to move on to as promised. What is an emotion? And this is the way I like to

00:41:01.720 --> 00:41:06.600
 teach this. I find it really helpful. I hope you'll find it helpful as well. An

00:41:06.600 --> 00:41:14.560
 emotion experienced in your mind. I'm gonna break it down to two parts and two

00:41:14.560 --> 00:41:23.400
 parts only. An emotion is simply physiology, a physical, physiological body,

00:41:23.400 --> 00:41:31.060
 physiological response. Physiology plus story. Story, mental response. Down to the

00:41:31.060 --> 00:41:35.380
 fundamental teachings of Buddha Dharma we're talking about Nama Rupa. There's

00:41:35.380 --> 00:41:41.660
 maybe unfamiliar to some of you. Nama is concept thinking story and Rupa is

00:41:41.660 --> 00:41:47.660
 form body. So body concept. Physiology and story is the way I like to offer

00:41:47.660 --> 00:41:54.080
 this. So we're hypothetically any of us to be feeling a little bit of

00:41:54.080 --> 00:41:59.420
 irritability or dismay or...

00:42:00.000 --> 00:42:04.740
 subtle or less subtle negativity toward this sound.

00:42:04.740 --> 00:42:06.580
 There'd be two things going on.

00:42:06.580 --> 00:42:07.680
 There'd be the physiology.

00:42:07.680 --> 00:42:09.960
 I can say, I can feel it now that it's been going on

00:42:09.960 --> 00:42:14.960
 for a while, it's 42 minutes, who's counting, of the sound.

00:42:14.960 --> 00:42:18.960
 I can feel it in my body a little bit of,

00:42:18.960 --> 00:42:25.020
 what would I call it, a little bit of slight unsettledness

00:42:26.400 --> 00:42:29.720
 because it is a noise and you're feeling Neil's nodding.

00:42:29.720 --> 00:42:31.360
 Yeah, it's not bad.

00:42:31.360 --> 00:42:34.520
 There's other times I'd be really rattled in the body by this.

00:42:34.520 --> 00:42:40.520
 But there's a little bit of sort of unsettledness

00:42:40.520 --> 00:42:41.480
 in the body.

00:42:41.480 --> 00:42:43.680
 So there's a physiology that where I don't label it,

00:42:43.680 --> 00:42:45.840
 I would label it towards the unpleasant.

00:42:45.840 --> 00:42:51.160
 And then there either is or is in a story

00:42:51.160 --> 00:42:53.680
 and the story might be as simple as gosh.

00:42:53.680 --> 00:42:58.560
 It'd be nice if this stopped or given that I'm a teacher

00:42:58.560 --> 00:43:01.680
 and people are here to share the Dharma.

00:43:01.680 --> 00:43:04.080
 Ah, I hope this isn't too distracting for people.

00:43:04.080 --> 00:43:05.440
 I hope it doesn't really get in the way

00:43:05.440 --> 00:43:07.480
 of their experience tonight.

00:43:07.480 --> 00:43:10.320
 Or we can make up lots of more stories like,

00:43:10.320 --> 00:43:12.240
 you know, darn it, this is ridiculous.

00:43:12.240 --> 00:43:14.760
 Why doesn't the city organize himself better

00:43:14.760 --> 00:43:17.360
 and have an off switch or, you know,

00:43:17.360 --> 00:43:19.080
 or what a waste of time.

00:43:19.080 --> 00:43:21.040
 I drove all the way here for Maple Bay

00:43:21.040 --> 00:43:25.000
 and sitting in the dark and his calm is loud

00:43:25.000 --> 00:43:26.640
 and nobody came.

00:43:26.640 --> 00:43:29.040
 (laughing)

00:43:29.040 --> 00:43:30.840
 The most important people came.

00:43:30.840 --> 00:43:31.880
 The vips came.

00:43:31.880 --> 00:43:38.280
 So there you go, that could be physiology plus story.

00:43:38.280 --> 00:43:39.480
 But let's bring this home.

00:43:39.480 --> 00:43:42.440
 Let's bring this to you to your felt experience today

00:43:42.440 --> 00:43:43.280
 or this week.

00:43:43.280 --> 00:43:44.920
 So I'm gonna ask all of you to do a thought experiment.

00:43:44.920 --> 00:43:47.000
 I'm not gonna necessarily ask you to share it.

00:43:47.000 --> 00:43:48.120
 Don't worry about that.

00:43:48.120 --> 00:43:50.120
 But think about an emotion you had.

00:43:50.120 --> 00:43:53.720
 Ideally today, we certainly would be great.

00:43:53.720 --> 00:43:55.040
 A negative emotion.

00:43:55.040 --> 00:43:56.160
 It might have been small.

00:43:56.160 --> 00:43:58.440
 Might have been medium and it might have been thin.

00:43:58.440 --> 00:43:59.920
 You matter how to stab.

00:44:00.000 --> 00:44:07.840
 anger when someone said something that felt really unkind and unfair, you might have got bad news

00:44:07.840 --> 00:44:13.840
 about someone you love and there might have been a sense of fear and worry, right? You might

00:44:13.840 --> 00:44:20.720
 have had a frustrating experience at work or an ingrosially lying or trying to fix something at your

00:44:20.720 --> 00:44:24.800
 house and it wouldn't work and you almost got there and then the tool broke and it all got worse

00:44:24.800 --> 00:44:32.560
 or whatever, frustration, anger, sadness, grief, etc., any of those things. Think of a negative

00:44:32.560 --> 00:44:40.400
 emotion you felt small, medium or big today or in the last few days and then do a self-experiment.

00:44:40.400 --> 00:44:46.160
 As you think about it, put yourself back in there if you can, as best you can, cast your mind back,

00:44:46.160 --> 00:44:52.800
 cast your thinking back. Do you can you reconstruct your can you recall? It's okay if you can.

00:44:53.600 --> 00:45:01.360
 How the physiology felt? How the physiology? How the body felt? There may have been a sense of

00:45:01.360 --> 00:45:05.840
 clenching if there was an anger or frustration, there may have been a sense of this unsettled

00:45:05.840 --> 00:45:10.720
 yuckiness in your chest if it was more in the anxious. It may have felt more in your head like,

00:45:10.720 --> 00:45:19.120
 you know, tightness in the face, it's hard to say. But think about how did the body feel?

00:45:19.120 --> 00:45:25.200
 Now when the body is experiencing a reaction to something perceived as unpleasant, scary,

00:45:25.200 --> 00:45:33.600
 negative, unwanted, mean, sad, upsetting, the body tends to go into a variation. It can be very

00:45:33.600 --> 00:45:39.840
 subtle, more or less of a fight, flight or freeze response. It can be very subtle. So if you're

00:45:39.840 --> 00:45:43.360
 kind of annoyed, it can be a little bit of a fight response like, that's really stupid,

00:45:43.360 --> 00:45:49.280
 if it had been outgoing, it can be more of a flight response like, I don't want to deal with that

00:45:49.280 --> 00:45:54.800
 pulling away, or it can be a bit of a freeze like, oh, this is unpleasant. I don't know what to do,

00:45:54.800 --> 00:45:59.920
 which you're effectively great hatred and delusion actually, you know, move toward it.

00:46:00.000 --> 00:46:01.200
 You're going to move away from it.

00:46:01.200 --> 00:46:03.760
 Are you going to be stunned?

00:46:03.760 --> 00:46:06.640
 So in the body, there's cortisol.

00:46:06.640 --> 00:46:07.600
 There's adrenaline.

00:46:07.600 --> 00:46:09.040
 There's, you know, chemical changes.

00:46:09.040 --> 00:46:11.420
 There's even hormonal subtle shifts that happen

00:46:11.420 --> 00:46:14.400
 when the body is in a little bit of distress

00:46:14.400 --> 00:46:17.600
 because of something the mind is struggling with.

00:46:17.600 --> 00:46:21.720
 Remember, the body cannot discern

00:46:21.720 --> 00:46:24.040
 whether a mental story is true or not true.

00:46:24.040 --> 00:46:25.080
 So let's get to the story.

00:46:25.080 --> 00:46:27.800
 I said, "In emotion is physiology plus story."

00:46:27.800 --> 00:46:32.800
 So let's say, try to come up with a different example here.

00:46:32.800 --> 00:46:38.280
 Okay, let's say you're employed with some of us

00:46:38.280 --> 00:46:40.080
 aren't employed, we're retired.

00:46:40.080 --> 00:46:42.680
 Let's say you're employed and you get to work

00:46:42.680 --> 00:46:44.720
 and there's a somber kind of email

00:46:44.720 --> 00:46:46.320
 when you open your email.

00:46:46.320 --> 00:46:48.200
 All staff, please read, urgent.

00:46:48.200 --> 00:46:50.160
 Oh, I'm already stressed myself.

00:46:50.160 --> 00:46:52.640
 And then it says, we're very sorry to inform you

00:46:52.640 --> 00:46:54.360
 that due to changes in the economy,

00:46:54.360 --> 00:46:56.880
 there will be some massive layoffs coming.

00:46:56.880 --> 00:46:59.840
 We'll tell you who's gonna get fired next Tuesday.

00:46:59.840 --> 00:47:04.240
 So what do you imagine might happen?

00:47:04.240 --> 00:47:06.280
 You need the job, you even like the job,

00:47:06.280 --> 00:47:09.960
 you get paid well, the job market's not good right now.

00:47:09.960 --> 00:47:10.960
 What's the reaction?

00:47:10.960 --> 00:47:13.720
 Probably for a number of us in anxiety reaction

00:47:13.720 --> 00:47:16.080
 would be a one-berry common one.

00:47:16.080 --> 00:47:19.560
 For others it might be despair, sadness.

00:47:19.560 --> 00:47:20.840
 For others it might be anger.

00:47:20.840 --> 00:47:22.120
 Well, it's just BS.

00:47:22.120 --> 00:47:23.560
 I've been with this company forever.

00:47:23.560 --> 00:47:25.480
 You don't know you're getting laid off yet,

00:47:25.480 --> 00:47:26.840
 but there could be anger.

00:47:26.840 --> 00:47:28.480
 And what's gonna go on in the body?

00:47:28.480 --> 00:47:31.360
 Well, I tend more towards an anxious response

00:47:31.360 --> 00:47:33.400
 to something like that than an angry one.

00:47:33.400 --> 00:47:35.040
 I've lots of angry responses,

00:47:35.040 --> 00:47:36.200
 but something like that it would tend

00:47:36.200 --> 00:47:39.680
 to worry or anxiety is likely where this body would go.

00:47:39.680 --> 00:47:40.960
 This mind would go.

00:47:40.960 --> 00:47:42.800
 So the body would have some adrenaline

00:47:42.800 --> 00:47:45.360
 and some jigglyness and some unpleasantness.

00:47:45.360 --> 00:47:46.680
 But a cortisol, the mind would be like,

00:47:46.680 --> 00:47:48.040
 oh no, this is really big.

00:47:48.040 --> 00:47:50.120
 I really hope I don't get fired

00:47:50.120 --> 00:47:52.720
 because I'm a pretty decent person.

00:47:52.720 --> 00:47:53.560
 I'd probably also have,

00:47:53.560 --> 00:47:56.040
 and I don't want my friends to get fired.

00:47:56.040 --> 00:47:57.800
 Well, if I'm fired, it will happen.

00:47:57.800 --> 00:47:59.280
 And can we live on one salary?

00:47:59.280 --> 00:48:00.120
 Like a...

00:48:00.000 --> 00:48:04.240
 And that would all happen, like, within pretty much milliseconds, right?

00:48:04.240 --> 00:48:05.240
 And seconds.

00:48:05.240 --> 00:48:08.120
 It would be story, there would be physiology.

00:48:08.120 --> 00:48:13.840
 Now, if I opened the email, and there was a headline that said, "important announcement

00:48:13.840 --> 00:48:16.840
 everybody read right away, I'd have a little bit of anxiety."

00:48:16.840 --> 00:48:20.800
 And then, if I were to read it and it said, "Happy to announce we're going to have

00:48:20.800 --> 00:48:24.600
 you a four-day weekend, and we're having a big celebration," and everybody's invited

00:48:24.600 --> 00:48:29.680
 to a lovely dinner to bring your family, "Oh, I'd have a different response."

00:48:29.680 --> 00:48:33.800
 And the story and the physiology more or less co-occur.

00:48:33.800 --> 00:48:39.000
 If we were to break it down at the millisecond level, one would precede the other, but our

00:48:39.000 --> 00:48:41.880
 felt experience is mostly not always.

00:48:41.880 --> 00:48:45.880
 You could break this down in grosser ways in certain reactions, where the mind gets the

00:48:45.880 --> 00:48:47.880
 story and the body quickly follows.

00:48:47.880 --> 00:48:51.360
 The mind says, "Oh, no," and the body says, "Oh, no."

00:48:51.360 --> 00:48:57.840
 Because the body cannot tell whether a mental story is accurate or inaccurate.

00:48:57.840 --> 00:49:00.160
 The body does not have that capacity.

00:49:00.160 --> 00:49:05.080
 The mind has that capacity to evaluate the data and decide if it's as bad as we thought,

00:49:05.080 --> 00:49:09.240
 or if we can probably survive, or whether we misunderstood, or whether it's not a big deal.

00:49:09.240 --> 00:49:12.320
 I use this analogy so often.

00:49:12.320 --> 00:49:16.800
 Many of you here have probably heard it 20 times over the years, maybe more.

00:49:16.800 --> 00:49:23.920
 When we have a nightmare, we don't wake up, relaxed, we wake up suddenly and in a terrible

00:49:23.920 --> 00:49:29.360
 state of fright.

00:49:29.360 --> 00:49:33.600
 And then, within a few seconds, depending on how deeply you sleep and how groggy you

00:49:33.600 --> 00:49:38.480
 are and how tired you are, the mind will say, "It's okay, it's not real."

00:49:38.480 --> 00:49:39.480
 Great.

00:49:39.480 --> 00:49:40.880
 Now your mind is no longer frightened.

00:49:40.880 --> 00:49:44.960
 There may be some residue if it was a terrible, you know, watching someone get stabbed

00:49:44.960 --> 00:49:47.720
 to death in front of you or something that you love, like terrible.

00:49:47.720 --> 00:49:50.600
 There may be some residue in the mind, but the mind's like, "Okay, that wasn't real,

00:49:50.600 --> 00:49:52.200
 thank goodness, it's not real."

00:49:52.200 --> 00:49:57.160
 So the body stays freaked out for 20 to 30 minutes, because that's how long it takes

00:49:57.160 --> 00:50:00.000
 after cortisol and adrenaline dumped for a human body.

00:50:00.000 --> 00:50:05.440
 to clear those things out of the bloodstream more or less and for the body to be able to

00:50:05.440 --> 00:50:10.540
 reach homeostasis again, for the blood pressure to regulate again, the parasympathetic nervous

00:50:10.540 --> 00:50:16.560
 system, which is the calm down system to kick in, that all takes 20 to 30 minutes.

00:50:16.560 --> 00:50:23.480
 The body doesn't know whether someone actually got stabbed to death or whether it's

00:50:23.480 --> 00:50:24.480
 a dream.

00:50:24.480 --> 00:50:31.880
 The body cannot tell. This is ground breaking the important. It is reflected in secular

00:50:31.880 --> 00:50:36.480
 teachings. It is reflected in cognitive behavioral psychology. It's reflected in some

00:50:36.480 --> 00:50:41.440
 good personal growth work. There was a bumper sticker floating around for a while. Don't

00:50:41.440 --> 00:50:47.120
 believe everything you think, right? What the mind comes up with isn't necessarily true,

00:50:47.120 --> 00:50:54.280
 but the body will believe it until you use the mind to tell the body it's not true.

00:50:54.280 --> 00:51:00.600
 Important, all employees read right now. Due to economy, there's going to be massive layoffs.

00:51:00.600 --> 00:51:04.960
 Your job may not be safe. You'll find out next Tuesday. That's the data. So, ladies,

00:51:04.960 --> 00:51:08.200
 it was just data.

00:51:08.200 --> 00:51:16.280
 If we were Dr. Spock, like I'm not a huge Star Trek fan or aficionado, but Dr. Spock logic,

00:51:16.280 --> 00:51:21.640
 just logic. Logic would say, "Okay, there's the data. I either will or will not be laid

00:51:21.640 --> 00:51:30.360
 off next Tuesday." That's all it is. If the body didn't react and if a story didn't

00:51:30.360 --> 00:51:35.080
 build, it would just be data. It would be like, "Oh, okay." And you get back to work

00:51:35.080 --> 00:51:42.040
 and you'd see what happened Tuesday. That's all. There'd be no distress. So, an emotion

00:51:42.040 --> 00:51:45.760
 is body plus story and because you're all very smart, you can already figure out, well,

00:51:45.760 --> 00:51:51.400
 okay. If there's a negative emotion being experienced, anger, fear, annoyance at the

00:51:51.400 --> 00:51:58.720
 beep, et cetera, et cetera, I can work with that. I have a choice. I have the ability

00:51:58.720 --> 00:51:59.920
 potentially.

00:52:00.000 --> 00:52:02.900
 I shift this around to change this.

00:52:02.900 --> 00:52:04.960
 So I can work with the body.

00:52:04.960 --> 00:52:09.460
 I can work with the story or I can work with both.

00:52:09.460 --> 00:52:10.340
 Okay, great.

00:52:10.340 --> 00:52:13.060
 Waking up from a nightmare, again, great analogy.

00:52:13.060 --> 00:52:16.080
 Because right away, we mostly work with the story.

00:52:16.080 --> 00:52:18.580
 'Cause we realize the story isn't true for you.

00:52:18.580 --> 00:52:22.140
 Didn't just watch my dog get run over in a car.

00:52:22.140 --> 00:52:22.980
 It was a dream.

00:52:22.980 --> 00:52:24.780
 Didn't just watch my house burn down.

00:52:24.780 --> 00:52:26.300
 It was a dream for you.

00:52:26.300 --> 00:52:28.260
 So we changed the story right away.

00:52:28.260 --> 00:52:29.780
 And there's not much dispute there.

00:52:29.780 --> 00:52:32.340
 The mind doesn't go, "No, your house room is worked down."

00:52:32.340 --> 00:52:34.220
 It pretty much accepts the house is standing.

00:52:34.220 --> 00:52:35.420
 We're good.

00:52:35.420 --> 00:52:37.780
 The body, again, remains freaked out for a while.

00:52:37.780 --> 00:52:40.140
 But you can work a little bit to gentle the body.

00:52:40.140 --> 00:52:42.580
 You could do a little stretching, a little deep breathing,

00:52:42.580 --> 00:52:43.780
 a little meditation.

00:52:43.780 --> 00:52:45.100
 You could use the mind to say,

00:52:45.100 --> 00:52:47.780
 "That was a really scary dream, but we're safe.

00:52:47.780 --> 00:52:49.180
 Everybody we love is safe.

00:52:49.180 --> 00:52:51.500
 The house isn't burnt down all as well."

00:52:51.500 --> 00:52:53.020
 You could chant a mantra.

00:52:53.020 --> 00:52:55.900
 You could read a silly book to distract yourself

00:52:55.900 --> 00:53:00.260
 while well the system starts to slow back down.

00:53:00.260 --> 00:53:02.340
 You have the ability.

00:53:02.340 --> 00:53:07.340
 You have the power to not let emotions boss you around.

00:53:07.340 --> 00:53:12.660
 I like that one.

00:53:12.660 --> 00:53:16.940
 You have the ability to not let emotions boss you around.

00:53:16.940 --> 00:53:21.820
 Now, please don't take that on as self-recrimination.

00:53:21.820 --> 00:53:24.460
 I should be better at getting out of my bad emotions.

00:53:24.460 --> 00:53:25.540
 I've played that game.

00:53:25.540 --> 00:53:28.100
 It's a pointless game and nobody wins.

00:53:28.100 --> 00:53:32.700
 It is really difficult to change an emotional state

00:53:32.700 --> 00:53:34.420
 or we'd all do it just like that

00:53:34.420 --> 00:53:36.660
 because we're not massacres and we're not foolish.

00:53:36.660 --> 00:53:37.860
 We don't like feeling angry.

00:53:37.860 --> 00:53:39.660
 Well, maybe a little bit when we got a head of steam,

00:53:39.660 --> 00:53:42.220
 but after that it quickly starts not feeling fun.

00:53:42.220 --> 00:53:43.500
 We don't like feeling weak.

00:53:43.500 --> 00:53:46.340
 We do not like feeling anxiety.

00:53:46.340 --> 00:53:48.020
 We do not like feeling hatred.

00:53:48.020 --> 00:53:52.060
 If it were as easy as ah, just a mind state,

00:53:52.060 --> 00:53:55.260
 just a physiology, all dissolved.

00:53:55.260 --> 00:53:59.300
 that would be fantastic, and all of us would do it all of the time.

00:53:59.300 --> 00:54:01.300
 But what we--

00:54:00.000 --> 00:54:04.000
 can do is practice, but we can do is try.

00:54:04.000 --> 00:54:09.000
 What we can do is say literally, oh man,

00:54:09.000 --> 00:54:12.720
 this sounds annoying and we're in this dark cold hall

00:54:12.720 --> 00:54:13.840
 and they probably can't even see me

00:54:13.840 --> 00:54:15.160
 'cause I'm not lit.

00:54:15.160 --> 00:54:17.920
 Make sure you get my good side, Neil, et cetera.

00:54:17.920 --> 00:54:20.720
 Story story story, then the body could get agitated

00:54:20.720 --> 00:54:23.720
 and I could feel, oh, let's just build a story.

00:54:23.720 --> 00:54:25.520
 Oh, the Dharma class sucks.

00:54:25.520 --> 00:54:27.920
 It's the worst Dharma class ever.

00:54:27.920 --> 00:54:30.920
 You know, stupid mother nature and the wind,

00:54:30.920 --> 00:54:33.600
 like it can just go when it can go.

00:54:33.600 --> 00:54:35.160
 You know, what a waste of time.

00:54:35.160 --> 00:54:36.800
 I should've just stayed home.

00:54:36.800 --> 00:54:39.720
 This talk's probably sucks.

00:54:39.720 --> 00:54:41.200
 You know, I didn't even look at my notes

00:54:41.200 --> 00:54:42.640
 'cause it's too dark.

00:54:42.640 --> 00:54:45.200
 Whatever, right?

00:54:45.200 --> 00:54:46.240
 All of it.

00:54:46.240 --> 00:54:47.160
 It doesn't help.

00:54:47.160 --> 00:54:48.320
 We know all of this.

00:54:48.320 --> 00:54:50.200
 And this is, I think, where we need to really,

00:54:50.200 --> 00:54:53.000
 I wanna repeat, be really careful about self-recrimination

00:54:53.000 --> 00:54:54.400
 and beating yourself up.

00:54:54.400 --> 00:54:57.000
 That it is difficult for most of us

00:54:57.000 --> 00:54:59.440
 as much of the time.

00:54:59.440 --> 00:55:01.720
 It is difficult for most of us,

00:55:01.720 --> 00:55:06.720
 much of the time to go, oh, that's just a story.

00:55:06.720 --> 00:55:08.560
 Like popping a balloon.

00:55:08.560 --> 00:55:12.280
 Sometimes it works though.

00:55:12.280 --> 00:55:17.280
 If it's something small, like a sound, I walked in

00:55:17.280 --> 00:55:21.080
 and Neil and Shelley were here, they'd set up

00:55:21.080 --> 00:55:24.480
 and they both look happy and unruffled.

00:55:25.560 --> 00:55:28.200
 Like, go, Dharma, go, right?

00:55:28.200 --> 00:55:31.760
 Because, arguably, the success of this class

00:55:31.760 --> 00:55:33.840
 rests on their shoulders.

00:55:33.840 --> 00:55:36.000
 Shelley opens the room, she sets the room up.

00:55:36.000 --> 00:55:38.480
 Shelley wants it to be warm and lit.

00:55:38.480 --> 00:55:41.440
 Neil brings in a rather massive amount of equipment.

00:55:41.440 --> 00:55:43.680
 You'd think it was a rock concert in here.

00:55:43.680 --> 00:55:45.240
 Carries it in, sets it up.

00:55:45.240 --> 00:55:46.080
 He's got no power.

00:55:46.080 --> 00:55:47.920
 He's got no electricity.

00:55:47.920 --> 00:55:49.880
 He's hoping, I guess, that his computer batteries

00:55:49.880 --> 00:55:51.360
 well charged 'cause it's not plugged in

00:55:51.360 --> 00:55:53.040
 as it usually would be, right?

00:55:53.040 --> 00:55:54.040
 It might die, by the way.

00:55:54.040 --> 00:55:55.840
 If you lose us, it's been lovely.

00:55:55.840 --> 00:56:00.200
 And imagine earlier in our work together.

00:56:00.000 --> 00:56:08.500
 Imagine it was our your second class and you're kind of nervous, right? I think we wanted them to be nice for this class and you might have had a lot more

00:56:08.500 --> 00:56:10.500
 consternation, right?

00:56:10.500 --> 00:56:20.000
 It's so great. Well, we find something pretty small like an inconvenience. Oh, this is a mild inconvenience. So it is.

00:56:20.000 --> 00:56:26.000
 It's not even inconvenient, but we'll call it an inconvenience. It's getting pretty dark. It's a little chilly and it's a little loud.

00:56:26.000 --> 00:56:36.000
 Just a minor inconvenience. And we all kind of just, you know, approached them that way. Kim and Carolyn came in just a couple minutes late. We started right on time.

00:56:36.000 --> 00:56:55.000
 And neither them kind of went, oh, no, this solved. All of us have done that before. I've done that before. I'm not saying that tomorrow I might not have walked into the exact same set of circumstances. And if I'd had a particularly frustrating day or was edgy or something, I might have, I probably would have enough dignity to not show it.

00:56:55.000 --> 00:57:06.000
 But internally, I might have gone, oh, this sucks. So what? So what? If that's the response, you can catch it and say, hmm, that's not helpful. It's not fun.

00:57:06.000 --> 00:57:14.000
 So what can I do to help change the story? Oh, this is a great opportunity to practice. It's a great opportunity to practice

00:57:14.000 --> 00:57:33.000
 equanimity to be with things as they are. There's no suffering if we just accept this, because the way it is, we can't get the power back on, turn off the light, turn off the sound Richard Drive. And we can't have electricity and we can't make it warmer.

00:57:33.000 --> 00:57:50.000
 It's the way it is. There's no stress in that equanimity. It is what it is. Fine. No need for negative emotion. None. Just an opportunity to practice.

00:57:50.000 --> 00:58:06.000
 So start tonight, start and begin again tomorrow and next day and next week and so on. We've got several questions.

00:58:00.000 --> 00:58:02.700
 classes booked two of them are on your schedule.

00:58:02.700 --> 00:58:03.700
 We've booked more in Yale.

00:58:03.700 --> 00:58:04.860
 I'd haven't given them to you yet.

00:58:04.860 --> 00:58:07.980
 We've got some times in May and June now booked as well.

00:58:07.980 --> 00:58:10.380
 But the next two classes will be here,

00:58:10.380 --> 00:58:13.540
 and probably more gentle circumstances.

00:58:13.540 --> 00:58:15.540
 The next two Thursdays, I believe

00:58:15.540 --> 00:58:17.300
 are April 2nd and 9th.

00:58:17.300 --> 00:58:19.020
 But this has been sent out multiple times,

00:58:19.020 --> 00:58:21.580
 and Neil will continue to send it out.

00:58:21.580 --> 00:58:26.380
 Between now and April 2nd, a week from this Thursday,

00:58:26.380 --> 00:58:29.420
 I want each and every one of you, and write it down

00:58:29.420 --> 00:58:31.100
 if you're at home, and those of you here,

00:58:31.100 --> 00:58:32.900
 write it down when you get home, and put on a little slip

00:58:32.900 --> 00:58:34.740
 of paper, or post a note, or somewhere

00:58:34.740 --> 00:58:37.660
 you run your phone reminder, whenever it works for you.

00:58:37.660 --> 00:58:42.900
 That says, physiology plus story, question mark,

00:58:42.900 --> 00:58:45.140
 or however you want to put it.

00:58:45.140 --> 00:58:47.140
 What is this emotion?

00:58:47.140 --> 00:58:48.140
 What is the story?

00:58:48.140 --> 00:58:50.540
 What is the body sensation?

00:58:50.540 --> 00:58:55.780
 And three times a day, three times a day.

00:58:55.780 --> 00:58:57.780
 Just don't it's an emotion.

00:58:57.780 --> 00:59:02.100
 And think, what's the story, and what's happening in the body?

00:59:02.100 --> 00:59:06.300
 Start to become a scientist of your experience.

00:59:06.300 --> 00:59:10.420
 Because the more you can catch an emotion when it arises,

00:59:10.420 --> 00:59:15.220
 or when it hasn't had time to fester.

00:59:15.220 --> 00:59:19.300
 And I'm thinking I'm a kambucha, like brew, and stew.

00:59:19.300 --> 00:59:21.660
 I like kambucha, it's not a kambucha disk.

00:59:21.660 --> 00:59:25.580
 But if you can catch an emotion earlier, sometimes not always.

00:59:25.580 --> 00:59:29.180
 It hasn't gained as much momentum.

00:59:29.180 --> 00:59:33.140
 If you can catch the train when it's just starting to puff

00:59:33.140 --> 00:59:35.940
 a start to gain speed, and then turn it off

00:59:35.940 --> 00:59:40.140
 and allow it to drift down to stasis again to a non-movement,

00:59:40.140 --> 00:59:43.900
 that's easier than trying to stop a runaway train,

00:59:43.900 --> 00:59:46.700
 which is our mind to offer.

00:59:46.700 --> 00:59:51.460
 So three times a day, till we meet again, make it 30.

00:59:51.460 --> 00:59:52.500
 Make it 500.

00:59:52.500 --> 00:59:56.620
 But three times a day, catch an emotion.

00:59:56.620 --> 00:59:57.780
 Big, medium, or small.

00:59:57.780 --> 00:59:59.900
 And simply, as a detective.

01:00:00.000 --> 01:00:04.260
 With that curiosity, one of those positive factors of mind that you noted as a positive

01:00:04.260 --> 01:00:10.680
 emotion, you know, with curiosity, what is the story, what is the body sensation, the feeling

01:00:10.680 --> 01:00:14.240
 in the body, the physiology?

01:00:14.240 --> 01:00:21.920
 It may or may not help shift the emotion in that moment, but sometimes it will.

01:00:21.920 --> 01:00:27.640
 Like maybe flash of irritability or a flash of worry, pretty small, catch it.

01:00:27.640 --> 01:00:28.640
 What's the worry?

01:00:28.640 --> 01:00:30.200
 It might happen, maybe.

01:00:30.200 --> 01:00:31.200
 What's the body?

01:00:31.200 --> 01:00:36.400
 A little bit of tension in the chest area, a little bit of fizzy feeling, great.

01:00:36.400 --> 01:00:37.400
 Move on.

01:00:37.400 --> 01:00:38.800
 You can do more with it.

01:00:38.800 --> 01:00:42.440
 You could, you work with the worry mind and say, yep, we don't know for sure what will

01:00:42.440 --> 01:00:46.640
 happen, but no matter, I love this phrase, no matter what happens, everything is going

01:00:46.640 --> 01:00:48.520
 to be okay.

01:00:48.520 --> 01:00:51.960
 This is a very good phrase to tell anxiety.

01:00:51.960 --> 01:00:56.680
 No matter what happens, everything is going to be okay because it's actually true, it's

01:00:56.680 --> 01:01:00.200
 actually always true, no matter if it's cancer, everything's going to be okay.

01:01:00.200 --> 01:01:03.000
 No matter if I die tomorrow, everything's going to be okay.

01:01:03.000 --> 01:01:06.440
 No matter if I go bankrupt, everything's going to be okay.

01:01:06.440 --> 01:01:09.280
 Because when you can train the mind, you don't have to be a booty, you can be a regular

01:01:09.280 --> 01:01:12.720
 mortal like all of us right now, I think.

01:01:12.720 --> 01:01:17.120
 But the fact is, even if a bunch of terrible stuff happens, everything is going to be

01:01:17.120 --> 01:01:21.000
 okay if we're okay in here.

01:01:21.000 --> 01:01:25.960
 If we're okay in here, can we be at ease with that death, that loss, that bankruptcy,

01:01:25.960 --> 01:01:30.880
 that bad news, even be at ease with our dying process of we're lucky enough in my biased

01:01:30.880 --> 01:01:36.880
 view to have a dying process, are we lucky enough to have time to wrap our mind around

01:01:36.880 --> 01:01:37.880
 that we're leaving?

01:01:37.880 --> 01:01:44.600
 When we're young, medium or old and have time to maybe create beauty and create connection

01:01:44.600 --> 01:01:50.000
 and maybe right love letters to everyone we love, that's why I consider it lucky if we

01:01:50.000 --> 01:01:51.000
 know.

01:01:51.000 --> 01:01:54.120
 That's just my biased opinion, you don't have to hold the same, that's fine.

01:01:54.120 --> 01:01:59.840
 I hope I very much have an idea I'm winding down and can therefore.

01:02:00.000 --> 01:02:07.000
 We make the most of that time, and maybe share kindness as much as I can.

01:02:07.000 --> 01:02:15.000
 So, emotion equals physiology plus stories, a formula I'd like us all to explore and play with.

01:02:15.000 --> 01:02:19.000
 And then bring your questions next class, your observations.

01:02:19.000 --> 01:02:25.000
 The four noble mind states, the four positive emotions, the four only emotions that are left

01:02:25.000 --> 01:02:34.000
 when all the clouds of confusion and greed and hatred and fear and selfish and distress and wanting things to be different

01:02:34.000 --> 01:02:37.000
 and having trouble accepting the ups and downs of life.

01:02:37.000 --> 01:02:45.000
 When those all melt away at full Buddhahood, all that's left is abundant and endless loving kindness for all.

01:02:45.000 --> 01:02:57.000
 Abundant and endless compassion for all, you're one of the all, so that means self-compassion to abundant and endless empathetic joy, which a Bodhi Satva wants.

01:02:57.000 --> 01:03:03.000
 A Bodhi Satva, she wants everyone to become awakened before she'll take the final step.

01:03:03.000 --> 01:03:10.000
 He wants all beings to awaken fully. They want every sentient being to be fully awake.

01:03:10.000 --> 01:03:15.000
 So, they stay behind. They don't take the final step towards full Buddhahood.

01:03:15.000 --> 01:03:23.000
 They stay, they get reborn on the planet, allegedly, metaphorically or literally, to continue to help others awaken.

01:03:23.000 --> 01:03:33.000
 And when every single sheep has safely got through into the enclosure of enlightenment, then and only then do they walk through the gate.

01:03:33.000 --> 01:03:36.000
 That's empathetic joy.

01:03:36.000 --> 01:03:40.000
 Not all. Niels of Buddha, and I'm not.

01:03:40.000 --> 01:03:49.000
 It's like, "Hey, Niels of Buddha, now let's help Richard, Carolyn, Kim, and Shelley, and the neighbor, and the dog, and the grasshopper."

01:03:49.000 --> 01:04:00.000
 All to get fully awake. And then maybe this being will walk through, providing everybody else has already had the abundant joy of full awakening.

01:04:00.000 --> 01:04:08.640
 So it must be on a timer.

01:04:08.640 --> 01:04:13.320
 The case you noticed the dimming, there was some like battery operated emergency lights.

01:04:13.320 --> 01:04:17.880
 Apparently they're like, the bar is closed.

01:04:17.880 --> 01:04:19.440
 Yeah.

01:04:19.440 --> 01:04:28.800
 Well, yeah, my lovely, my lovely white hair shows up while I was just going to close.

01:04:28.800 --> 01:04:29.800
 So that was dramatic.

01:04:29.800 --> 01:04:30.800
 I like that.

01:04:30.800 --> 01:04:32.520
 You're going to blend it better.

01:04:32.520 --> 01:04:33.520
 So we'll close.

01:04:33.520 --> 01:04:35.680
 We won't sit in meditation together tonight.

01:04:35.680 --> 01:04:38.160
 I invite everybody at home to set a 30 minute timer.

01:04:38.160 --> 01:04:39.960
 Don't cheat and make it 20 minutes.

01:04:39.960 --> 01:04:41.720
 That's on you if you do.

01:04:41.720 --> 01:04:42.720
 30 minute meditation.

01:04:42.720 --> 01:04:47.720
 I invite everybody here to do a 30 minute or maybe a little bit shorter of a meditation

01:04:47.720 --> 01:04:52.680
 when you get home, depending how far you need to travel and how late it is.

01:04:52.680 --> 01:04:57.080
 And if that feels like too much, because the body is really wearing, do a 10 minute meditation.

01:04:57.080 --> 01:05:03.040
 Including those of you online, despite the poking aid all the 30 minutes, 10 minute meditation.

01:05:03.040 --> 01:05:06.680
 And just breathe in and out of the heart.

01:05:06.680 --> 01:05:08.960
 Think of a blue sky.

01:05:08.960 --> 01:05:12.960
 And then emotion is a cloud that arises and then it dissolves.

01:05:12.960 --> 01:05:15.360
 It arises and then it dissolves.

01:05:15.360 --> 01:05:21.440
 I hope you'll join me in person or online Thursday, the second for our next class.

01:05:21.440 --> 01:05:26.360
 Probably in slightly more gentle circumstances, but one never knows.

01:05:26.360 --> 01:05:33.080
 And just before I close with a dedication in the bill, we are in the process of just finalizing

01:05:33.080 --> 01:05:35.000
 another one day retreat.

01:05:35.000 --> 01:05:38.960
 It is probably going to be on Saturday, May 9th.

01:05:38.960 --> 01:05:44.360
 We have an option at Bethlehem in the chapel and we have an option here in June and I haven't

01:05:44.360 --> 01:05:45.360
 yet told you all.

01:05:45.360 --> 01:05:50.560
 I think Wendy knows, but we'll just ask the team what they'd prefer and we won't announce

01:05:50.560 --> 01:05:55.960
 either Mayor June or another one day retreat and save the date for the week long retreat

01:05:55.960 --> 01:05:59.960
 August 27th to September 3rd, I am a little behind and

01:06:00.000 --> 01:06:06.320
 my work and so I will write up on the description this weekend or this week. By next week

01:06:06.320 --> 01:06:12.080
 there should be a bit of a delay till Bethlehem gets all the registration that story worked out

01:06:12.080 --> 01:06:19.120
 and then you'll have the topic and you should be able to register soon. And for now we will

01:06:19.120 --> 01:06:27.040
 close with a dedication of merit. For the sake of all beings may there be wisdom and compassion,

01:06:27.680 --> 01:06:37.840
 may all beings be well and happy, that's meta, that's loving kindness. May all beings be free from

01:06:37.840 --> 01:06:47.680
 suffering, that's the second one, that's compassion. May all beings dwell in joy, that's empathetic,

01:06:48.320 --> 01:06:56.480
 or sympathetic joy and may all beings dwell in equanimity not feeling close to some and distant

01:06:56.480 --> 01:07:02.960
 from others. It's the classic way of saying it. I like to add there being with things as they are

01:07:02.960 --> 01:07:08.320
 so that it may allow us to then take compassionate action to make wholesome change.

01:07:08.320 --> 01:07:17.600
 Thank you for your patience or impatience with the sounds. Thank you for being here and sharing

01:07:17.600 --> 01:07:22.800
 this evening with us. Thanks again to Neil and Shelley, we might need the others to hold their

01:07:22.800 --> 01:07:31.200
 phone flashlights to see everybody safely out to their cars. And it's just sound, it's just lack of light,

01:07:31.200 --> 01:07:38.000
 and it's just a little bit chilly, that's all it is, arising and passing away. Thank you very much,

01:07:38.000 --> 01:07:48.160
 they're my pleasure. You're welcome, everybody. That was pretty cool. Yeah, I mean, I'm a showwoman,

01:07:48.160 --> 01:07:53.360
 I'm a performer, I could not have orchestrated that with a team better. Like, can you just

01:07:53.360 --> 01:07:59.920
 dramatically like write it, you know, write at the end of the talk? Anyway, that's a

01:08:00.000 --> 01:08:05.000
 Thanks everybody, enjoy your meditation, and bye for now.